One time I was out shopping with my mom and I started playing with a display thing, and she was like “What are you doing?” and I sarcastically was like “Worshiping Satan, obviously” and she was like “Seems a bit conceited to worship yourself, but whatever makes you happy”
SO I JUST GOT A SHOT OF A RAINBOW AND LIGHTNING IN THE SAME PICTURE????!
The gays strike back.
I’m making my mom cook me this.
The only valentine I need
I took a photo of a fucking steak in the store and put it on the internet and now almost 16 thousand people have it on their blogs, I wonder whoever has this steak knows how famous it is. I bet this cow is in cow heaven wearing sunglasses and shunning the other cows because now a piece of his fucking body is on 16 thousand people’s blogs. I need to sit down for a minute.
I will never have a post get this many notes ever again
Running into closeted homosexuals from high school at the gay club
Jennifer Lawrence & Lupita Nyong’o
“Did you put your name into the Goblet of Fire, Harry?” he asked calmly.
8 years later and everybody is still annoyed about this i genuinely love the harry potter fandom
so today in the dressing room there was this hot guy in his underwear so i decided to take a picture of his bulge and i forgot my fucking flash was on… finish the story yourself
I really want to know how this ended for you…
i want a sugar daddy, except i want no contact with him at all.
in fact, he’s not even allowed to think about me except when writing the checks out to me.
basically i just want a rich old man to send me money so i can buy tattoos and pretty clothes